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Old 03-03-2009, 11:47 PM   #1
heypalheypal is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2008
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Default I loved 97.1 fm talk NWS language

This says it all. I use to listen to FHF then Tom Leykis(if I weren't listening to John and Ken). Then they took the whole station down for another top 40 station called amp(gay). Anyways this guy feels the same way I do.

From http://drunkrepublic.com/component/m...e&id=161&lang=


Friday was a sad day for those of us in the greater Los Angeles area and beyond.



If you’re like me (and you know you wish you were) you’ve got enough sources for music in your ride. Ipod, XM, Sirius, HD radio, CD, and lastly if you’re desperate you can always flip on the FM radio and hear the latest soulless garbage being pumped out from every talentless hack who was given a record deal. I’m looking at you T-pain.



For me, amongst the mindless drivel of the FM dial, there had been one gleaming beacon of hope. The last bastion of entertainment occupying the radio waves, a place where comedic genius, stimulating discussion, and a departure from the norm were prevalent throughout the day. This desert island in a sea of talentless shitty radio garbage was the one place on the dial where you could tune in and REALLY be entertained. A novel concept I know, but imagine it… an FM station where you could be entertained rather than have your brain atrophy to the audio diarrhea that is Britney Spears' latest single.



Well, as all truly good things in this world tend to do, 97.1 KLSX died Friday February 20th, 2009.



Cause of death: Stupidity, conformity, and corporate greed.



Now you might ask:
“Mr. Guru, if it was so awesome then did they replace it with something really spectacular?”



To which I would reply (after awakening from by alcohol induced coma):
“Mr? You can call me Dr. Guru, amateur OBGYN. Pass me that bottle of Jack… Oh… and No. No they did not pull the plug on 97.1 in order to give us something spectacular. They gave us another fucking top 40 radio station!!"




Now as I’m sure is the case of pretty much every major metropolitan area, we need another top 40 station like I need places to stash dead hookers, and trust me, I don’t. You can’t go 2 stations up or down the dial without being subjected to the horrors of the TOP 40 RADIO, much the same way you can't stick a shovel in my backyard without hitting a dead hooker. You know what? I blame Ryan Seacrest. Yes, Seacrest, the raging, denial ridden, homosexual radio and TV host that wouldn’t know real musical talent if it was fucking him in the ass with a splintered broom handle. He's responsible for brain washing an entire generation into believing that genuine talent is found on a reality TV singing contest.



So now when I reach for the FM button on my deck and hit that 97.1 preset I won’t get the sage wisdom of Tom Leykis, I’ll get to hear how much Katy Perry liked munching rug.



My radio won’t offer me the pure glorious splendor of Adam Corolla’s rants (For what its worth, I hate passion fruit tea too Ace). Instead I’ll be bludgeoned by Chris Brown, or his music… equally painful either way.



No more laughing along with the hilarity of Frosty, Heidi, & Frank. Now I’ll contemplate suicide to the sounds of Beyonce, Madonna, and Pink.



The laughs I’ve enjoyed while playing a round of ‘What Is Jesse Jackson Saying?’ with Tim Conway Jr. will be replaced with a game of ‘How the fuck does Nickelback sell records?’



Nope, never again will I laugh out loud on a long trip down a crowded California freeway. Now instead of talk radio entertainment I’ll get the musical equivalent of a wire coat hanger abortion in a Tijuana back alley. Thanks a lot CBS radio, your bad decision has removed the last REAL source of entertainment from the FM airwaves.



Why don't you lock yourself in a room with Seacrest and listen to a couple hours of your hideous radio station now. It should only take a little while before your brain tries to escape your skull through your eye sockets, but that'll be right before Seacrest is overcome by homo-erotic desires and decides to skull rape you to death.



Get a clue or get fucked you pricks.
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